Standing on the Threshold of Change

I remember at the end of the school year, before finals and the flurry of preparation for graduation and parties ensued, I was talking to Lester on the phone as he voiced ideas of going to India. I sat, I stared at the wall, the ceiling, my tangled gray bed sheets where I was sitting, and as I seriously considered flying off with him -to India or wherever his passion pushed him- a door visualized within my mind, and I felt the ridged doorframe beneath my feet. I knew that this door was a new direction, a new way of life that had opened up to me, and as I stood looking into the milky gray light, I pushed forward.

Since then, I experienced a number quiet leadings, such as while centering in the falling water of the shower, a hawk manifested within my mind which lead me to this River Woman. Then, the song "Just Around the River Bend" unraveled things burrowed deep within me that I was unaware of, bringing to my attention the opposing mindsets of the steady diligence of the first man that I thought I would marry and the sometimes jarring spontaneity of my current boyfriend; the smooth path (like a beating drum) or the one that continues just out of sight (just around the river bend) so that you have to first start on its path before you can learn all that it holds.

Once I graduated, things began to fall in motion:

I quit my job; took about a moth's time to mentally detox from academia and constant activity; found a new job waiting tables during the lunch hours which gets me more money than a full day of retail and gives me more time to write after my shifts; through this job, I have started working for a gentleman on his architecture book, and continue to make other connections, handing out my card to strangers; and when winter comes, I will be flying off to Costa Rica.

A few days ago, I took a pause from the dishes and stared out the window. My body felt charged, full of energy and breath in my muscles, the hair on my skin rose as though a gust of wind was swirling around me, and my ears were filled with a sound like water rapids. I stared out the window and watched to trees sway in the wind and their leaves flutter as though they acknowledged this surge of energy. With tingling skin, I returned to the dishes.

Serendipity abounds. A seemingly reckless voyage to Costa Rica awaits. Who knows what else? These random moments are arguably coincidental, unless you believe that everything happens for a reason.

The image of the open door still fills my mind. I feel the wind and water surging around me as events stir into motion, and in short, it excites me.

I stand on the threshold, eager for what is to come.